贝蒂妙厨

One day a woman came up to her husband
and told him that the TV was broken
and she was missing her shows.
一天一个女人来到他丈夫身边告诉他电视机坏了，她不能收看她想要看的节目。


"Does it say cable repairman anywhere on my forehead?" he asked.
丈夫问：“我额头上写着电工两个字吗？”


"No," she said.
没有，她说


A few minutes later she came back and told him
that the porch was breaking and it was dangerous.
几分钟后她折回来对他说，门框坏了，看样子很危险。


"Does it say carpenter anywhere on my forehead?" he asked.
丈夫答道：“难道我脑门上写着木匠两个字吗？”


"No," she said again.
没有，她又一次说道

A few minutes later she came back and
told him the toilet was backed up.
几分钟后她折回来告诉他盥洗室的水正往外倒流。

"Does it say plumber anywhere on my forehead?" he asked.
“难道我脑门上写着水管工几个字吗？”他问。

"No," she replied.
不，她回道

A couple of days later he went on a
buisness trip. When he came back
he asked how things had been.
几天后他出差了。回来就问：“事情怎么样了？


"Well," she said, "our neighboor down the street came over and
fixed our TV, repaired our porch, and unclogged our pipes."
“很好”，她说：“我们同一条街上的邻居来玩时帮我们修好了电视，修葺了我们的门框，疏通了卫生间的下水管道。”“那么酬金呢？”他惊讶地问。


"What did he ask for in payment?" he wondered.
“那么酬金呢？”他惊讶地问

"All he asked for was a chocolate cake or a kiss," she told him.
他说了，一块巧克力蛋糕或者一个吻都行。”她告诉他。

"What did you do?" he asked.
你是怎么做的？他问道


She looked at him smugly and said:
她看着丈夫不无得意地说：“你能看到我额头上贝蒂妙厨的字样吗？


"Do you see Betty Crocker written anywhere on my forehead?"
你没看我额头上写着贝蒂妙厨的字样吗？

注：Betty Crocker贝蒂妙厨 其生产的食品材料与食谱既方便又简易，是美国妇女消费者心中一个永远的品牌指标。 http://www.91xiaohua.com/Jokes/yingyu/200711/Jokes_80339_2.html 登陆这个网站，还有别的

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　　Five Hundred Times 五百遍

In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."

在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭里，一位年轻女士被带到法官面前，她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单。女士向法官解释，她是一名学校老师，请求法官马上处理她的案子，以便可以赶回去上课。法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠，说道：“你是学校的老师，对吗？女士，我马上要实现我毕生的愿望了。在那张桌子旁坐下，写‘我开车闯了红灯’500遍。”（

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shall by too dull doll by too jack won,
dolphin long can Jim shall by too low,
shall by too when dull low, doll car low,
dolphin long doll Ham Eason
“more power!”

～～～～知道啥意思么～～～～

小白兔到大白兔家玩，
大灰狼看见小白兔了，
小白兔闻到了，逃开了，
大灰狼大喊一声
“莫跑！”

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　　一天，我和表哥去赶公交车，好不容易等来一辆，可车上的人太多了，前门根本就挤不上。我们只好在前门刷了卡，从后门上车，可车上的人实在太多，后门也挤不上。于是，司机大哥就和我们商量：我先发动车，慢点开，你们跟在车后面跑跑。我和表哥这个纳闷啊：这算什么办法啊？可也没有办法，只有跟在车屁股后面跑。眼看车开出大概有十来米，忽然一个急刹车 ，车上的乘客把持不住身体，全部倒向车的前面去了，后门一下子腾出好大一块地方。这时，司机大哥得意地招呼我们：快上，快上……