1.Our Tails 我们的尾巴
The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"
教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了？”

"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".
“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。 “该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”

2.I'm Trying to Stop It

"Boy, why have you got cotton-wool in your ear? Is it infected?"

"No, sir, but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other , so I am trying to stop it."
“孩子，你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵？它感染了吗？”

“没有，老师。可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进，一个耳朵里出，所以我要把它堵在里面。”

3.“I'm sorry ，Madam ，but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”

“Twenty d ollars! Why ，I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”

“Yes ，but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”

“对不起，夫人，为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元。”

“20美元！为什么？不是说好只要4美元。”

“是的，但是你的孩子大喊大叫，把另外四个病人吓跑了。”

更多：
http://wenku.baidu.com/view/accce6c7aa00b52acfc7ca01.html

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　　.THE ANT AND THE DOVE
蚂蚁和鸽子

One hot day, an ant was searching for some water. After walking around for some time, she came to a spring.

To reach the spring, she had to climb up a blade of grass. While making her way up, she slipped and fell into the water.

She could have drowned if a dove up a nearby tree had not seen her. Seeing that the ant was in trouble, the dove quickly plucked off a leaf and dropped it into the water near the struggling ant. The ant moved towards the leaf and climbed up there. Soon it carried her safely to dry ground.

Just at that time, a hunter nearby was throwing out his net towards the dove, hoping to trap it.

Guessing what he was about to do, the ant quickly bit him on the heel. Feeling the pain, the hunter dropped his net. The dove was quick to fly away to safety.

MORAL: One good turn deserves another.

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　　A Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说

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　　Last week, Mrs Black went to London. She didn’t know London very well, and she lost her way. Suddenly she saw a man near a bus stop. She went up to the man and said, “Excuse me! Can you tell me the way to the hospital, please?” The man smiled. He didn’t know English! He came from Germany. But then he put his hand into his pocket, and took out an English dictionary. He looked up some words. Then he said slowly, “I’m sorry I can’t understand you.”
上周，布莱克夫人去了一趟伦敦。她不太熟悉伦敦，结果她迷路了。突然她在一个公共汽车站附近看见一位男子。她急忙向这位男子走去，说道：“劳驾您一下！请您告诉我去医院的路，好吗？”这位男子笑了。他听不懂英语。他来自德国。但是他将手伸进了自己的衣袋里，从里面掏出了一本英语词典。他查找到了一些单词。然后他一字一句地说：“我很抱歉我听不懂你说的话。” 呃 还有 我是女的。。。